I know how it sounds. Either I'm over-spiritualizing or belittling the heartache. It's so hard to feel gratitude when you feel scattered, unsure of the future, frustrated with the present, lost in grief.
In the ear of one Infertile certain tones of, "Be grateful for what you do have" register as a piercing cacophony of gong! cymbal! buzz! chime!
The pain runs so deep.
The truth is we are supposed to be grateful and give thanks always, no matter what.
Thank [God] in everything [no matter what the circumstances may be, be thankful and give thanks], for this is the will of God for you [who are] in Christ Jesus [the Revealer and Mediator of that will].
1 Thessalonians 5:18 AMP
Through Him, therefore, let us constantly and at all times offer up to God a sacrifice of praise, which is the fruit of lips that thankfully acknowledge and confess and glorify His name.
Hebrews 13:15 AMP
Sometimes thanksgiving is full of joyful warm & fuzzies, but sometimes thanksgiving is intensely sacrificial. Either way, we are asked to offer praise and gratitude because, unlike our feelings, He is unchanging and absolutely good.
In giving thanks-- especially when I'm not feeling it -- I assert the following:
*God is Lord of all and worthy of praise {just for who He is}.
*Jesus marked all of my sin "null & void," giving me the greatest future I could ever imagine.
*I am entitled to nothing but am blessed by good and unmerited gifts every day.
*God is in control and it is good.
*I am not in control and it is good.
*He hears the "yes" in my heart, the one that pierces me and makes me more like Christ, and He will honor it.
*None of the "things" I pray for will ever satisfy me the way a relationship with Him satisfies.
*I am looking for you, Lord; I am searching to see the beauty you give for ashes. I believe you're here with me, even in this valley.
In this barren desert place a thankful heart is a saving grace. If I were to spend my entire season of infertility focused on self, marinating in emotion instead of truth--what she's getting, what I'm not getting, why I deserve this and it's so unfair--I would most likely look back on this season with resentment, shaking my fist at God, determining that He broke my heart and wasted my time. I've seen it happen and I fight against it every day.
- But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well.
- Matthew 6:33 NIV
We might not ever have answers to our list of questions. At the end of our lives we might look around at a scene that's quite different from what we imagined. But if we sought Him first, we can know that His way was best and we can look back at our list of gratitude and know that He was with us through it all.
My {short} list of thanks for IF:
1. time to be healed
2. time to be planted in His courts
3. quiet days
4. growing in faith
5. growing in love for people
6. everyday ministry opportunities
7. time to learn who He is
8. lazy mornings with my husband
9. long walks with the dog
10. uninterrupted conversations
11. time to run
12. leisurely perusal of grocery store aisles
13. grace to get out of bed after hard news
14. marriage established in Him
15. freedom to be with my grandmother before she died
16. sweet friendships rooted in real love, not like-circumstances
17. peaceful days by the pool
18. time to learn about maternity care options
19. a story to encourage others
20. protection
21. patio gardening
22. spontaneous weekend getaways
23. laughter
24. toxin-ridding tears
25. support of those who believe with us
Recommended Resources:
One Thousand Gifts: A Dare to Live Fully Right Where You Are by Ann Voskamp
Believing God by Beth Moore
You YODU, you wrote this for me didn't you? This really hit home; so thank you! Awesome words!
ReplyDeleteQuestion though, what did you mean by the "yes in your heart?" What does that mean?
Thank YOU for being such a faithful supporter! Great question regarding the "yes." Here's what I mean by that:
DeleteI believe that God is in control of all things and His ways are best. Practically, this means that when He gifts me with a new job, a new house, food to eat, and loving friends, I agree with what He's done. I say "yes" and "amen" (whether in my heart or out loud) and accept His gift as good. These are the easier "yeses." And on the flip side when I trials and obstacles come my way, when everything living gets pregnant except me and circumstances don't seem to be good, I learn to say the hard "yes" and "amen" because regardless of how it feels, I still believe that He is in control and His ways are best. We get this example from Christ in the Gethsemane, pleading with God to take the cup of crucifixion if He were willing. In the end, Jesus gave the hard "yes," knowing that the trials & torture before him were nothing compared to the glory to come.
Does that make sense? Thanks again for reading!
Thanks again for your thoughts. Always and encouragement.
ReplyDeleteI continue to pray that the Lord will give you the desire of your heart.
Stay faithful, thankful, joyful.... dependent.
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Thanks friend!
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